This section aims to advise you on what to do if you find yourself in an unavoidable incident of domestic violence. The next section, planning to leave, gives advice on what you need to think about when planning to leave your abuser.

• Have a plan ready - be prepared for an emergency situation ( planning to leave will help you with this).
• Confide in someone you trust. Neighbours are a good option, if you have some you know and trust, as they can listen out for trouble, and are close by should you need them.
• Make arrangements so you always have somewhere to go in an emergency. See the links page for contact details for Women's Refuges across the county.
• Have a bag packed and ready and leave it somewhere out of sight, but also somewhere you can easily retrieve it in an emergency - perhaps at a friend or neighbour's house.
• Think about things you would need to take with you - important documentation, money, chequebook, keys, medication and important telephone numbers. (See planning to leave for further details).
• If you do not live with your abuser, make sure your home is secure.
• If you no longer live with your abuser, tell your neighbours and/or the local police so they can alert you if the abuser is seen in the vicinity of your home.

In an unavoidable incident of domestic violence:

• Get out of danger if you can - leave the house and go straight to a safe place.
• If you cannot leave the house move to a room or area where there is an exit. Avoid the kitchen, bathroom or garage or anywhere near any potential weapons.
• Be aware of anything you know triggers an angry or violent response from your partner.
• Try to keep your body language, movement and tone of voice as non-threatening as possible.
• Keep a distance of at least two or three feet between you and your partner to avoid entering his/her 'personal space', which may escalate the situation.
• Avoid eye to eye or toe to toe body positions, these may appear confrontational, and again, aggravate the situation.
• Try to have a plan in place that will enable you to get help in these situations. You could arrange a signal to alert neighbours to get help, have access to a mobile telephone or silent alarm, or teach your children how to call the police. Teach your children that it is not safe for them to intervene directly and that they should remove themselves from danger if they can.

After an incident:

• If have been injured ensure you get medical help. If you cannot get it immediately, try and see a doctor or nurse as soon as you are able. Ensure your injuries are recorded, and if possible photographed. This is evidence that can be used against your abuser in any criminal proceedings. If you feel you are ready to get help, tell a doctor or nurse how you sustained the injuries, they will contact the relevant agencies to get you help and support.
• Try and seek professional advice. By admitting to an agency that you are a victim of domestic violence you will get the help and support you need and deserve. You will not be forced to go to the police if you do not want to.
• If you are unable to seek professional help try and tell someone you know and trust who could contact professionals on your behalf. Do not feel ashamed. This isn't something you have to go through alone. It is not your fault and you deserve help and support.